(Telephone conversation with favorite nephew. We don’t really talk about how he is my favorite, but it is a generally understood agreement in my family. He, on the other hand, openly declares me his favorite aunt.)
Kristin: Did you know that I moved into a new townhouse, and Matt and I have a pool?
Nephew: You DO?! Is it as big as Grandma’s pool in Arizona?
Kristin: Yes. I think it might be bigger. And we have THREE hot tubs.
Nephew: Maybe you should start swimming laps and become a professional swimmer for a job.
Kristin: Do you think that I could get a job as a professional floater?
Nephew: No. (Cue awkward silence.) Hey! Do you wanna spend the night at my house when you visit?